Blocking Our Own Dreams
I've been noticing a lot lately that when I’m digging for what a client really wants in their life, people tend to answer with what they think they can have, instead of what they are truly searching for.
As a Business and Purpose Coach, I get to chat with lots of amazing people about their life goals and purpose, and this practical outlook certainly has its place in coaching. But when I ask about their dreams for themselves, few have clarity and many start describing side steps or little wins instead of big leaps forward - even when the question is about their DREAMS!
It's like we can’t let ourselves think freely about what the dream would even look like. We can’t see our endless possibilities because we’re so bogged down by our current reality. This can really get in our way on a neurological level when we want to create change - because we're using the same thinking and circuitry that got us into our current situation. Creating an exciting new reality for ourselves requires a much more limitless mindset!
The ‘Be Realistic’ Loop
We all have this voice in our heads, right? The one that says, "Be realistic." It nudges us to play it safe, to think about what’s achievable in our current situation. This is super practical, but sometimes, it can be a bit of a party pooper, especially when it comes to dreaming big.
Why Dreaming Matters
Here’s the thing: when we allow ourselves to dream without any limits, something magical happens. We start to see a future that truly excites us, a future that’s worth chasing. It's like finding your personal ‘True North’. This isn’t just fluffy talk – on a neurobiological level (the part of your brain that deals with this is called your Orbitofrontal Cortex), having an inspiring vision can genuinely help us get moving, shake things up, and make things happen.
Kicking the ‘But I Can’t’ Habit
Many of us are stuck in a ‘but I can’t’ mindset. It’s like wearing blinkers that only let us see what’s right in front of us. Most of the time we absolutely can, we just won’t! My job as a coach is to help you take those blinkers off. We dive into what makes your heart sing, looking beyond the here and now. It’s about dreaming in technicolour, not just black and white.
Our Dreaming Playbook
So, how do we start building this dream of yours? Here are some steps we can take together:
Think Big, Then Bigger: This step is about liberating our thinking so we can get to somewhere different.
Question the Naysayers (Even the Ones in Your Head): Tackling those pesky limiting beliefs is not for the faint-hearted, but a great coach can help with this.
Picture Your Success: Imagine your dream in vivid detail – how does it look, feel, smell? An important part of this process on a neurological level is also, counter-intuitively, about picturing the potential failure and downsides to continuing on as you are now. We need a little bit of fear in this cocktail to give ourselves the best chance at propelling forward!
True to You: Make sure your dream aligns with what truly matters to you, your values.
Mapping the Journey: Sketch out a route from here to there, step by step, breaking down every section into manageable, bite-size pieces. This is where your practical mindset skills can be channelled!
Wrapping Up
Dreaming big isn’t just about setting goals; it’s about unlocking a part of ourselves that yearns for something more. It’s about discovering possibilities we never knew existed. And you know what? The journey to that dream can be just as thrilling as the dream itself. So, let’s dream big together, and see where it takes us.